June 24, 2024
KATHMANDU – “How much oxygen do you have for the summit?”
I think this is the kind of question a film producer would ask. But when you’re on the mountain, the answer is never clear.
I have worked for a long time in the film industry and different art areas, especially photography and engraving.
Working in various fields and drawing inspiration from them has become a new normal for me. I have made this approach my way of life without even realising it.
I took responsibility for producing the last movie I worked on and shot the behind-the-scenes footage for a documentary. By doing so, I witnessed the entire shooting process and the journey of a movie.
In the snowy highlands of Turkey, we had to endure the consequences of the changing climate to shoot ‘About Dry Grasses’, directed by Nuri Bilge Ceylan. The highlands used to be snowy in January, but by the time we got there in the same month, there was no snow. Nature was changing. It was responding to what was happening—to what humanity had done to it.
In the end, it snowed, and we shot the intense snow scenes we wanted. But since most of our days were sunny, unlike what the director wanted, we had to shoot in the sunset and sunrise hours.
As crew members, we spent many days waiting for the sun to set.
Production requires creating opportunities, finding solutions, and being creative for a work of art to come true. For this, patience, endurance, calmness, and timing are necessary. On the other hand, nature wanted us to listen to it and wait for the right time.
During that time, I witnessed many of nature’s lessons. For example, I experienced extreme cold for the first time. We endured temperatures ranging from -33 degrees to +55 degrees. By listening to nature, surrendering to its forces, and working within its limits, we managed to persevere.
No matter how much you prepare or plan during the pre-production phase, if you are working in nature, remember that nature will always have the final say.
The film was completed, released, and connected with audiences. Its success at Cannes 2023 was followed by my trip to the North Pole for my project. I returned with a mix of wonderful developments, joys, and challenges. During this process, I experienced life and death, happiness and sadness, losses and awards.
I realised the value of being able to breathe comfortably a few days after my father’s chemotherapy ended. Just a few days earlier, he had said, “Well done, my daughter. I’m glad you went!”
All the anxiety and hard work, filled with fears at the beginning, were finally behind me.
Before going to Everest, when I was on the verge of giving up, defeated by my fears, I remembered my father’s words. Everest reminded me of what he said while struggling to breathe, adding a turning point to my life.
What does it mean to say ‘life’s turning point?’ How many turning points can there be in life?
Who am I, and what am I doing in this world? How well do I know my own limits? Can I find answers to these big questions? These thoughts sparked my dream of journeying to Everest. Now, after returning, I can say that it turned my life around.
“How much oxygen do you need for the summit?” sounds more like “How much do you need to hold on to life?”
How many reasons do you find that give meaning to your life, keep you alive, and allow you to breathe? How much can you endure in the face of obstacles, and can you keep believing that a solution will eventually come your way?
Can these questions be separated from the idea of measuring and assessing something, from learning its quantity and financial value? Can everything be known with certainty? Should the journey be fully understood in advance, with all its promises laid out? Should it be viewed like a purchase with a price tag, asking, “Is this journey worth this much?”
I had never trekked before and had no climbing experience. I had lived at sea level my entire life and had never been to a high altitude.
However, this journey was not only about the physical climb but also an inner discovery. After losing my father to lung cancer, his breathing difficulties taught me the fragility of breath, life, and existence.
I also mentally prepared myself for the physical challenges I might face. Despite all my concerns, could this journey help me understand the cycle of life and the resilience of the soul?
So, how could I make this trek possible? How could I land in Nepal? Despite all the economic difficulties and the many things I felt needed organising, I did my best and believed in it.
Since I was embarking on this journey, I felt I should share about my travels and inspire others.
Starting with photography, cinema, and engraving, which are already integral parts of my life, I dreamed of documenting and sharing the inspiring aspects of this journey.
After months of correspondence and dreaming, it all came true. Finally, I embarked on the journey with the goal of creating photographs, engravings, and documentaries.
I learned a great deal from my travels in Nepal, from the people I met, and from every moments I witnessed. I felt incredibly fortunate to have been able to honour my father’s memory with the peace and serenity I experienced in the Himalayas.
During my 15-day journey to Everest Base Camp, I encountered nature’s masterpieces at every turn. As concerns like “How will I endure?” and “How will I finish?” started to weigh on me, the mountains suddenly parted with the clouds and gazed down at me.
It was amazing to witness the appearance of ‘Gods’ that I had never seen before, in such immense size and in such a close, awe-inspiring manner beside me during that silent walk.
As someone who came from one of the most crowded cities in the world, Istanbul, while I struggled with my daily questions and uncertainties, trying to control everything, they stood there calmly, as if answering me.
They were just there—before and after.
My guide, Lakhpa Sherpa, always reminded me not to worry about how high we were, how long it would take to reach our accommodation, or what the weather would be like. He encouraged me to live in the moment, and he was right.
He advised me to focus on my breathing, not to get thirsty, to eat enough, and to appreciate the extraordinary beauty of the journey. In the mountains, plans dissolve and each moment is embraced as it comes.
All the good wishes, prayers, and everything encountered along the way were for the journey itself. The mountain was full of life, secrets, and everything I had wondered about.
This 15-day journey to Everest Base Camp was a solo adventure, yet I wouldn’t have been able to complete it without my guide, Lhakpa, and my porter. Additionally, I was fortunate enough to experience the hospitality, generosity, and honesty at Trekkers Paradise, which organised the entire journey and provided guidance.
I witnessed how dedication and sincerity are crucial in completing a journey safely and healthily. Ghanshyam Sharma, from Trekkers Paradise and Sauraj Jhingan, a climber who summited the Everest in 2018, shared their experiences with me during the journey.
They experienced the 2015 earthquake while they were at the Everest Base Camp.
As a filmmaker, their role as actors, and attention to detail played a significant role in bringing my dream photography and documentary project to life.
The sponsors of my journey were Turkish Airlines, The North Face, Apple, Canon, and Stanley. My supporters include Oscar International College and Nepal Film Campus. Throughout the journey, I shared many experiences, memories, and countless photos and images with my students.
On my way back home after 21 days, I celebrated my birthday on the plane. From the right window, the Himalayas bid me farewell. I felt like I had opened a new chapter in my life, and I was certain that I would return.
I had made many friends and memories in Nepal.
For now, I will be working on a documentary and preparing for a photography and engraving exhibition titled ‘My Soul Beyond the Mountain’.
To the Himalayas: This summer was spent with you, but we will meet again soon.